Adoption Prayer Requests

We are so thankful to have so many people praying for us during this adoption process.  For anyone interested in specific items to pray about, here are some things that are most important to us right now:

* Timing. Thank the Lord that the process has gone smoothly, and pray for His perfect timing on our travel dates (especially with working around Tabitha’s surgery).

* Finances. Thank God for the amazing ways He’s provided the money needed for this adoption!  We are so grateful for the help we’ve received from SO many people!  Pray that He provides the last bit of money we need in order to travel.

* Completion.  Pray that no complications arise that would prevent us from bringing Rayanna home within the next couple of months.

* Rayanna’s Health.  We’re not exactly sure what Rayanna’s needs are, if any.  Please pray that she’s completely healthy and that God would prepare us for anything we may face.

* The Big Kids.  I hate the idea of leaving them on the other side of the world while we take this long trip (even though they’ll be in good hands).  I’ll miss them terribly, and I’m sad that they won’t be there to welcome Rayanna into our family.  Pray for me to handle all of that well and not let it ruin the excitement of our time in China.  Thank the Lord for Heath’s parents’ willingness to keep them!  Pray that all goes smoothly for them, that the kids behave well and that they don’t miss us TOO much (though I hope they do miss us a little)!

* Safety/Health. Thank the Lord that we are in good health, and pray that no health issues arise for our kids or for us while we’re gone.   

* Adjustment for Rayanna. Pray for Rayanna’s emotional needs.  She’s about to go through a major change in her life and won’t be able to understand why.  Pray that she quickly bonds with us and soon feels at home in her new family and country.

* Adjustment for the Rest of Us.  Pray for wisdom and patience for us as we help Rayanna through the transition.  Pray also for the relationships among the siblings.  While they’re all excited, we know that it’ll be a big adjustment for everyone.  Pray that they all come to love each other and get along well.  Pray also that Heath and I would be able to balance our attention to each child and keep strong relationships with all four of them.

Thank you so very much for keeping us in your prayers.  We know it makes a difference, and we appreciate every one of you!

Runkles Piano Studio Recital

Today we had our end-of-year piano recital, featuring music from the Romantic era.  The kids did a fabulous job!  I was really proud of them, and pleasantly surprised at how well everyone played.  I gave out their certificates for another year of piano study.  It's hard to believe I've been teaching some of them for 7 years!

I usually perform too, to keep myself practicing and set an example for the kids.  This time I took a risk and played a tough piece I hadn't performed since college.  I didn't play as well as I could have "in my prime", but it turned out OK, and it was fun to have a challenge again.

This is a really great group of kids.  I've gotten to know them and their families pretty well over the years.  They aren't just students or clients any more, but they're also friends.  Great job today, kids!!

Article 5!

We just found out that we were granted our "Article 5 Letter" on June 9th.  This is the U.S. Consulate's approval that everything is in order for the adoption to be completed!  All that's left is for CCCWA (China's Adoption Authority) to issue our permission to travel!  That should happen in about 3 weeks, and then we'll get our travel dates!!  So it's looking like we'll leave sometime in the second half of July.

I can't believe we're getting so close!!  Hooray!!

My Husband

I thought I should take a moment to add a post about Heath.  He had his birthday on Saturday (which means he can no longer call me old since we're the same age again).  =)  But it's not just his birthday that makes me feel the need to write about him.  It's the fact that he is so amazing!

I usually write on this blog about my experiences and feelings, and lately there has been an abundance of negative posts in regards to Tabitha's medical issues.  But the truth is without Heath everything would be a whole lot worse.  In fact, I probably wouldn't even be posting anything at all.  When I worry and fret and complain about the the things we've had to deal with lately, he consoles me, and . . .  just does what needs to be done.  He never complains, never even acts bothered by all of this.  Even though he has to be at work most days, when he's home he takes care of the majority of the medical needs, including getting up in the middle of the night to empty her bag so it doesn't leak.  I have friends whose husbands will barely let them out of the house because they don't want to have to take care of the kids, but Heath is just the opposite.  He's always trying to make motherhood easier on me and finds ways to lift my burdens all the time.

I've probably thoroughly embarrassed him by posting this, but it needed to be said.  =)

Happy Birthday, Heath.  I love you.  Thank you so much for all you do.

Our Lovely Summer Begins

I got in "trouble" for saying that our summer is going to stink because of all of Tabitha's contraptions . . . the no swimming, no bike riding, and having to deal with poop and urine bags wherever we go.  Someone told me I should instead look at all the fun stuff we CAN do besides swimming and bike riding.  My philosophy is I'd rather assume it's going to stink and be pleasantly surprised, than to act like everything's fine and be upset when it turns out awful.  So call me a pessimist, but I'm sticking with my "this summer's going to stink" philosophy.  After all, if you expect the glass to be empty and it turns out only half empty that's a good thing.  If you expect it to be full, you'll be mad when it's not.

So anyway, today's our first day of summer break, having finished school on Friday.  Here's how it began:

Tabitha's bag (which was newly put on yesterday) was showing signs of coming off around the edges, so I retaped all that, hoping it'll hold a little longer.  (If we change to too often it could damage her skin.)  Oh, the reason it was a new bag from yesterday is that we had put on a new bag Saturday night, but unfortunately it had released its contents overnight, so Sunday morning we woke up to a daughter and her bed that were covered in those contents.  Cleaned up, put on new bag, off to church, no further incidents.

This morning one of my dear sons (who shall rename nameless) refused to get out of bed so we could proceed with our fun summer plans for today, and we had a wonderful time of, shall we say, character building exercises between him and me.  Meanwhile, while he was having some alone time to work on his attitude, I was helping the other two do their chores.  Tabitha finished brushing her teeth, and leaned against the edge of the counter top to wipe off the sink, the pressure causing the velcro closure on her ostomy bag to burst apart.  The contents were all liquid today and proceeded to skip over her clothes entirely, but made a huge puddle on the floor and splatters all over the walls, cabinet, and me.  It would've been funny if it weren't so nasty.  So I cleaned that up, went back to dealing with aforementioned attitude problem, and then proceeded to Tabitha's regular morning routine.  I got that all finished, my beloved son had a shiny new attitude, and I thought, "OK, we're good now.  Let's get ready for our outing to the park."

While I was still in the house and the kids were playing outside, Ethan and Tabitha came running in saying her bag popped.  I looked down, and the urine bag was empty, and her shoes and pant legs were drenched.  It didn't actually pop, but it had a leak in the seam.  Back to her bedroom, another change of clothes, clean up, put on new bag, resume life.  And at this point it wasn't even 10 in the morning.  At this rate it's going to be a LOOOONG summer.

We've already had to turn down 3 swimming invitations because it's sort of cruel to go to someone's house to swim and make Tabitha sit and watch.  And every time we leave the house I'm nervous something's going to leak or explode.  What supplies should I bring?  How many outfits?  What do I dress her in so the world isn't gawking at the bodily waste hanging off of her?  Is it even worth leaving the house?  I guess the experienced parents who said the ostomy is no big deal either had a very different experience than we're having, or have a very different definition of "no big deal."

Oh the good news....we started dilations on Friday.  That's where we stick a metal tube up her butt to make sure it's not healing shut.  Well, it doesn't hurt her at all, which we're very thankful about.  (See...look at me seeing that glass half full!)

I'm actually doing pretty well emotionally.  I'm not feeling overwhelmed or angry anymore, I'm just kind of resigned to this being our life for awhile.  I fully intend to make the most of this summer.  I'm not going to wallow in misery or anything.  But when I say that having to deal with these things all summer is going to stink, I think I'm right.  Anyone who disagrees is welcome to come takeover.  =)

A fellow adoptive mom, Kelly, shared this on her blog, and I had to add it to mine.  It's just too funny!  I'm definitely inspired to resume working on my Chinese before we go back this summer.  But the funniest thing about this video is knowing how crazy everyone watching these guys must think they are.  Westerners in China get enough funny looks, and then to hear them singing this ridiculous song in Chinese . . . . I wish I had been there!  

In the conversation at the beginning the guy means to ask for dumplings, but actually asks for "sleep well."  Chinese is a complicated language.  :)

Enjoy!

Cincinnati Again

We just got back from another trip to Cincinnati.  Heath, Tabitha and I left Thursday morning at 7 and got back Friday night at 7.  16 hours of driving, a night at a hotel, and an hour at the hospital.  It was worth it though.  We got rid of two of the tubes/bags.  These were big and very inconvenient, so we're glad to have those gone!

But she still has two tubes in her bladder to keep it empty.  One comes through the urethra and into the diaper, and the other comes out directly through her belly and empties into a bag that she has to wear all the time.  And she still has the ileostomy, which is a stoma that empties into a stick-on bag on her belly.  The bag is emptied several times a day, and every 2-3 days it has to be peeled off and replaced.  She HATES that.  All of this will continue for at least 8 more weeks.  Because of the tubes going into her bladder she can't go swimming or take baths; she also can't ride her bike for 3 months while the newly-created parts heal.  So no swimming, no bike-riding, and no easy way to wear shorts . . . makes for a real fun summer.  Here's what her belly looked like a few days ago.  Now it's the same, minus the two green tubes:

Since 8 weeks from now we'll most likely be in China, we'll have to wait until after the adoption to do the ileostomy closure.  I REALLY didn't want to do that, but that's how the timing has worked out.  Fortunately Heath's wonderful mom is willing to deal with all of Tabitha's "accessories" while we're in China, so the kids will all be staying with them.  When it's time for the surgery, we plan to take the whole family to Cincinnati and make another "vacation" out of it, so that we're not splitting up the family again so soon after our adoption and China trip.  I just keep wishing everything could've come together sooner so that all of this was taken care of last year!  But at least next summer should be OK!

As far as Tabitha's progress goes, the doctors were pleased with how everything's healing.  They said it's looking great!  We actually ended up seeing all 3 of her doctors at once instead of 3 separate appointments.  It was really great to have them all there in the same room at the same time.  (We love that Cincinnati team!)  There's still a lot going on though.  In another week we start dilations to make sure the anus doesn't heal too small.  That means twice a day for the next 3 months inserting a metal cylinder and increasing the size each week.  Once the ileostomy is taken away we'll go back to daily enemas for about 6 months.  After that we can try to potty train, but we don't know for sure whether or not she'll have bowel control.  She did show muscle movement at the exam yesterday, so I guess that's a good sign.

Gynecologically she'll just need regular exams to make sure the tissue is all staying healthy, and to check for cysts.  When they were doing her surgery they found an ovarian cyst which they removed and had tested.  In all the drama of the ileostomy and tubes and all, I didn't even have time to worry about that and almost forgot about it.  But when we talked with the doctor yesterday, she said it was benign and not a problem.  Thank the Lord for that!

Since she has the tube in her bladder and has kidney reflux, we have to flush the tube with antibiotics once a day, in addition to the oral antibiotics she takes.  She has stage 2 kidney damage, which is our biggest concern for her long term health.  Please pray with us that it doesn't get any worse, or even that God would miraculously reverse the damage.  She will need re-implantation of her ureters in order to fix the reflux (which is kind of like a leaky valve that needs to be replaced).  After the ileostomy closure this summer, more testing will be done on her bladder/kidneys; based on that her urologist/nephrologist will make plans for exactly when and what to do with the bladder and kidneys.  So she's got at least 2 more surgeries coming up in the next year.

Please keep praying for her health.  She's at a higher risk for infections because of the tubes, and with her kidney problems an infection could be very serious.  Also pray that her long term health would be good:  kidneys, bowel control, bladder issues, etc.  She has a lot going on.  Please pray for her emotions too.  She absolutely hates having the ileostomy and has been begging to ride her bike and go swimming but can't do either for most of the summer.

I'd also appreciate prayer for God's continued grace in helping me deal with all of this.  We had a major leak from her ileostomy on Wednesday during her nap.  It was pretty much the grossest thing I've ever dealt with in my life.  I'll spare you the details, but just imagine a leak while she's asleep, and then trying to get her dirty shirt off over her head.  Yup.  It was disgusting.  And Heath wasn't home so I had to deal with it.  Amazingly, I did not lose it, and I was even able to comfort Tabitha who was quite upset.  I don't think I'm exaggerating much to say that that was a miracle.  In my own strength I couldn't have come through that at all calmly.  So I know God is working, and I know He is with me providing strength every step of the way.  And yet I still worry.  How will we handle this?  How will we handle that?  What if this?  What if that?  And I still hate that we have to deal with this at all.  But I can definitely see God working on me, and somehow He will bring good out of all of this.

Now I need to focus on our last week of school and then getting ready for Baby #4!  Yay!!