The Things That Really Matter

This morning at church I feel like I really "met with God."  I hate to admit it, but even though I've been a Christian for almost 20 years and have gone to church pretty much every week, I don't always feel like I'm spiritually involved.  Sometimes I just go because that's what we do, you know?  I worship, I learn, I fellowship, but I don't always feel like much is happening on a spiritual level.  But every now and then I feel like God really does something supernatural in my life that wouldn't have happened on my own without the body of Christ.  Today was one such day.

Of course it was a fun and exciting day since everyone was eager to meet Rayanna!  I think she was a little overwhelmed by it all, but it was very exciting for so many people who'd been praying for her and helping us with the adoption process to finally get to meet her!  The service was a prayer and worship service, and we were led through the "ACTS" prayer:  Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication.  There was so much I needed to talk to God about in each of those areas.

God is so worthy of our adoration!  He is the only One who never changes, who is always loving, always holy, always perfectly and completely GOD.  And He is also the only One who really knows me and who loves me perfectly and completely.  Why do I take Him for granted so often?

There's always so much to confess to God.  It seems that no matter how many times I've confessed before, each day brings new opportunities for further confession.  Since we are also to confess sins to each other, I'll go ahead and share one of my main struggles.  I really struggle with anger as a parent.  I find myself yelling and losing my temper with my kids all the time, and failing to love them as I should.  One day this week was especially bad, and I felt like I couldn't even confess because I had failed so many times and repented so many times, but I just keep failing over and over again.  I kind of gave up on myself for a couple of days, thinking it would never change.  But this morning at church I felt God's grace reaching out to me once again.  I was reminded that I am RIGHTEOUS in His sight by the blood of Christ!!  Is there anything more amazing?  Why doesn't He get tired of me?  Why doesn't He give up on me?  Why should I be forgiven, when I've treated His forgiveness so lightly?  I can see why He forgives a new believer, who has only just realized their sin and need for a Savior.  But to forgive someone who's known Him so long and yet continues to fail over and over and over?!  That is truly AMAZING grace.  We sang "Our God" at the end of the service, and I was reminded that His power will indeed triumph over my sin.  I have the power of the God of the universe inside of me!  "And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us?  And if our God is with us, then what could stand against us?  Our God is greater, our God is stronger; God, You are higher than any other.  Our God is healer, awesome in power, our God, our God."  AMEN.

Adoration....Confession.....Thanksgiving.  There's so much to be thankful for.  Our biggest rejoicing right now is of course over our new little Rayanna.  She is an absolute joy, and it has been amazing to see God's hand in bringing her into our family!  I tend to focus on what's wrong in life, knowing that pretty much everything could be better than it is.  But I need to take time to just thank God for the infinite blessings He has filled my life with.

And finally, Supplication.  The one is where we (I) usually spend the majority of our prayer time, right?  Rather than focusing on personal desires our pastor had us focus on asking for healing and the needs of the hurting.  I prayed for physical healing for my aunt Lisa, who has been diagnosed with what sounds like a very bad type of cancer.  She's only a decade or so older than I am, and we're all taking this news pretty hard.  I prayed for spiritual healing for a couple of people close to me.  And then we were to pray for the hurting throughout the world.  The hungry, the homeless, sick people, military families, and so forth.  I thought of my brother who deploys to Afghanistan next month.  I thought of the poor people who struggle even to find food.  I thought of the many orphans throughout the world.  I couldn't hold back the tears when I pictured those rows of babies in cribs at Rayanna's orphanage.  Will they ever have a family?  Will they have someone tell them how precious they are and how much they matter?  Will anyone tell them about Jesus' love for them?

This very special time of prayer and worship today, focused on others instead of self, forced me to put my petty little complaints in perspective; to quit my whining about what's wrong with "poor Erin's world" and focus instead on how I can pray for and serve those who are in desperate need; to stop complaining and sulking about my problems and instead praise God for who He is and the absolutely wonderful things He has done for me.  It realigned my thinking off of self and onto the things that really matter.

I really feel like God did a work in my heart today, and I'm eager to serve and praise Him this week with a renewed spirit and a heart of joy.  Thank You, Lord, for Your unfailing love and for Your mercies that are new every morning.  I love You.