Time Travel

It’s amazing how deeply memories are lodged in our minds and hearts. What I’m about to describe will make no sense to some of you; others will nod and smile and think I’m a little weird; and then there’s the few of you kindred spirits who will know exactly what I’m talking about and feel, like me, that you can never really explain it to those who don’t “get it”.

This weekend we went back to Cedarville for homecoming. That’s the college where Heath and I met, and this year was my 10-year reunion. We got to see a few of our good friends (the loyal ones who came back—you know who you are). We got to visit the old “stomping grounds,” show Ethan and Jesse all around, see some favorite professors, and do a lot of fun things.

A lot of things didn’t work out, though: my roommate who’d been planning this with me for months was unable to make it, we didn’t see a lot of people that I’d hoped to, and we didn’t get to spend nearly as much time with people we did see as I would’ve liked. We didn’t do anything spectacular, the kids were way overtired, and our hotel was crappy. And yet, it was an absolutely amazing weekend.

I’ve been lying in bed, unable to sleep, just pondering how amazing it is that I still feel so connected to the people I went to school with there. Even though only a few of our friends could make it, there were so many familiar faces. We could walk up to people we hadn’t seen in over a decade, hug, and be so glad to see each other. And now I feel like I never left—the memories have come back so strong. It feels like I just saw “him” in class yesterday, I just ate lunch with “her” this afternoon, and I spent all weekend hanging out with “so and so”. It’s like the last 10 years never happened. (But the multitudes of offspring and the very young-looking current students are proof that they did.) I don’t know if it’s just sentimental me, if it’s something about Cedarville itself, if it’s a spiritual connection with brothers and sisters in Christ, or something purely psychological. But it amazes me how quickly I was transported back in time.

But now I’m back home, back in present-day life, back to the regular routine, back to being in my 30’s. I enjoy this stage of life—I am so blessed to have a wonderful husband and children, and I certainly don’t miss the long hours of studying from a decade ago! But I miss my old friends, acquaintances, and even the strangers whose familiar faces this weekend took me back to my college days. It’s not that I really want to go back to that time, but there’s a piece of my heart missing for each stage of life that I’ve left behind.

I think these emotions that I really can’t adequately explain are just proof that we are created as eternal beings. (I didn’t come up with that myself; I think it was C.S. Lewis who first taught me that.) There’s a longing for permanence, for not having to say goodbye, for concurrently experiencing all of life’s blessings (friendship especially), without leaving any behind. Sin has made our lives temporary and temporal. We’re not supposed to have to live in time—we’re supposed to live eternally, in perfect fellowship with God and people. I am so thankful that Jesus redeemed us, and that we are not doomed to this temporary world. I long so deeply for that day when, not only will we meet our Savior face to face, but we will be together with our loved ones, and the fellowship and celebration will last forever, with no more goodbyes and no more stages of life to leave behind. We will experience the eternal “now” and live always in that perfect present.

Like I said, this probably only resonates with a few of you. Most of you are probably a lot better than I am at living in the present and making do in this temporal world. But this weekend of “time travel” was really special for me, and I had to write it down, mostly just to process my own thoughts and feelings. Thanks for reading all the way to the end. Now I’m going to go back to bed and try again to get some sleep.